Friday, September 17, 2010

Writing Analogies- an addiction?


After looking back over some of my past posts, I realized I have a problem.  I’m constantly comparing the writing and querying process to other things in life, making analogies, metaphors, similes.   (Yes.  I put all three because I’m too lazy to God or Google what the difference is right now.)


It’s getting to the point where most of my posts begin with me comparing writing to some bodily function and querying to finding the love of your life.  Not pretty.  But I promise, I will seek help.

Let us have a look through creepy’s analogy (metaphor, simile) graveyard.   You might want to hold hands.  It’s scary in there.













LOL.  I'm sure there are more ridiculous analogies interwoven throughout my posts but these were the ones that stood out as I was reading.  Thank you for walking down memory lane with me!  What are some writing or querying analogies that have stuck with you?

42 comments:

DL Hammons said...

Constantly writing analogies is like a major league pitcher who falls in love with his curveball. Sooner or later....WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT AM I DOING? ARGH!!!!!!!!!

BTW...Your sperm post is a blog classic in my book!!

Will Burke said...

You've got 300+ followers; you're plainly doing something right! I quite enjoy your metaphore's (etc)

Jade said...

I liked the last one! Damn those pinata-whacking sticks!!!

salarsenッ said...

Me, too! I've compared writing and the writing life to my kid getting his driver's license, laundry, peeling potatoes--um...yeah--I know there are more. Just can't think right now.

";-)

Laura Pauling said...

Too funny! But analogies are great when it comes to the writing life. I think I can find them in just about anything I do!

Ellie said...

These are great! I think I like the sperm one best~ YOU could do a book about this, when you have your WIP done~xXx

Christine Danek said...

Too funny. I do this--it's just too early for me to think.
HAve a great weekend!

Anne said...

Ahaha but they are oh so funny! Keep it up!

Justine Dell said...

You do the author pokey and you and you write until your numb! That's what it's all about!

Awesome...

~JD

Stina Lindenblatt said...

Oh, these were just too funny. Especially the query ones. You've made me suddenly want to rewrite my wip AGAIN! Anything to delay querying the book.

I'm so linking this post to my blog when I announce I'm querying. (whenever that is).

Jaydee Morgan said...

When we're focused on them, it's not hard to start comparing them to everything in our lives.

And I agree, the sperm comparison is classic - and way too funny ;)

Cruella Collett said...

Nooooo, don't stop! Your analogies/metaphors/similes are hilarious, and no bloggers I know do them quite as well as you. Living life without these analogies would be like querying without Kleenex or bicycling without fish (see? I just proved my own point. I'm no good with analogies!).

Jess said...

Too funny! Keep it up--you're hilarious :)

Slamdunk said...

Ha, I think that is what makes your blog enjoyable and unique. I struggle with analogies and it is inspiring to see a pro at using them successfully.

Laura Marcella said...

I remember a lot of these! And they're all so true. *Sigh*

Thanks for the laughs!

Hart Johnson said...

*giggles* I love your analogies. Then again, I'm kinky that way. Yeah... the sperm one ranks high in the favorites list...

I think you just hang out at the 'admitting you have a problem' phase without actually trying to stop.

VICTORIA SAAVEDRA said...

We all love them! Keep em' coming :)

LTM said...

your analogies rule.

And the sad thing is they're so true... :D LOVE 'em~ <3

Clara said...

Hahahha omg the date analogy was freaking fantastic Kd!
I once heard of a guy who said: "Lets count rejections, make this a fun game until you get that deal!"

I was like, fuck you brother! If I get a rejection I wont be jumping around yelling: "Yippie, only 99 to go!"

Freaking hippies...

Kelly Dexter said...

You've had some fantastically apropos analogies, but the sperm post is still my favorite because it's so true!

C.E. said...

lol! Love em! And bizarrely accurate, go you! Keep pumpin out those funny, weird, and so very true comparisons!

Jayne said...

Your analogies are so true though! And one day we will all stop being creepy query girls and become creepy published girls! :)

There is an award for you on my blog by the way. You may already have it!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Does the hokey-pokey one lead to the one below it? Because I can see it happening...

Jolene Perry said...

your analogies are hysterical. Just keep rolling with it.

Old Kitty said...

I think your fab analogies says it all really.

Querying is scarier than the scariest scary thing ever! LOL!

take care
x

Jennie Bailey said...

I've been comparing writing and rewriting to CATS this week - from coughing up wordballs to scooping the gloop to proper grooming. I think I may need to seek help with you. It's like a snowball effect...it starts with the first metaphor and you pick up speed downhill, growing bigger with your attempted comparisons...see, it's a disease. I can't stop. I blame my 9th grade writing teacher who told me to show, not tell and let me get away with too many metaphors.

Nicole Zoltack said...

LOL Thanks for the laugh, I needed it today.

PK Hrezo said...

Those are hysterical! I just started following your blog (found it on Sheri's blogfest) and I'm glad I did.
I got a good chuckle from reading those... you are so right!

It IS painful at times.... I get the query hangover all the time. lol

Alexandra Crocodile said...

I can't believe I haven't seen your blog until now - I must have been living under a rock or something:)

randine said...

I like the query hangover. Totally been there. Promised, promised, myself I wasn't gonna query again. It ain't worth it. But then, suddenly, there I am, querying and sending like mad.
The next day I'm like DUDE, WTF??

Anyways, I think you so far as addictions go- the query analogy one is pretty harmless (much less so than crack, I hear) so keep it up!

Vivi Bickell said...

Ha!!! I LOVE the sperm analogy!! It's perfect! And I'm so glad I'm not the only one who has experienced the query hangover...and the walk of shame when I finally get my nerve up to open my laptop again.

Las Vegas Writer said...

These are awesome. Glad I could stop by your blog! Sorry, I don't have anything to add. You're doing just fine!

Donna Hole said...

That was fun. I'm lousy at similies and metaphores, so I enjoy good ones when I come across them. The comments section has been nearly as interesting as the post :)

I have an award for you over at my blog.

......dhole

Tamara Narayan said...

Don't dis the analogies! They are so much more creative than "I hate querying" or "editing sucks". My best query analogy was a person playing darts, blindfolded, not knowing which wall the target was posted on when the darn thing was on the ceiling the whole time!

miss ali said...

LMAO oh how i love your blog! this was a great post! i don't think you have a problem- i think you have some artistry going here :) favourite is a toss between the pinata and the writers version of the hokey-pokey!!!!

Teenage Bride said...

Well I love your analogies. You make me laugh hahaha.

Diane J. said...

I like the analogies and the last one is my favorite!

Amanda Sablan said...

These are all great writer analogies, but that last one... "There's just no more candy people." Hysterical. :]

Matthew Rush said...

Wow, I can't believe I missed this. Thanks to Stina for directing me back!

Lisa Gail Green said...

those were wonderful and hysterical and I love you for it!!

Remilda Graystone said...

Oh my God, these were hilarious. I especially loved the sperm and pinata one. So true.

Carolina Valdez Miller said...

Hahahaha! Oh my word, yes. I am a sperm. Fabulous use of figurative language!

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