Friday, June 11, 2010

Ten Sucky Things That Would Still Feel Better Than a Form Rejection on a Full or Partial MS

Back by popular demand. (Ok, FINE- nobody really asked for more ‘sucky things’ but I’ve always wanted to say ‘back by popular demand’….Just humor me) 
My last ‘ten sucky things’ post got some comments I wanted to share.  Apparently there are way more than ten sucky things that would feel better than a full or partial rejection! 

1.   1.   ‘I'd rather have my child projectile vomit in my face than get a form rejection to a full or partial.’- Candyland (wonderfully descriptive Candy, as usual)

2.   2. Your cat peeing on your pillow, and you not realizing it until you've put your head down... right after taking a shower.’ – Alexandra Shostak  

3.   3. ‘So mine is: Dropping a brand new jar of jelly and having it shatter...I had this last week, it is better than a rejection’- Red Boot Pearl

4.   4.  ‘Stepping barefoot on a chunk of banana laying on the nice carpet of the room you don't let the kids in (but obviously they were in, hence the banana on the floor). This incorporates the gross physical sensation plus the distress over trying to get smashed banana out of carpet with total fury at the adorable four year old who explained that she was feeding the dog (also not allowed in that room) her breakfast in there because the dog looked hungry. 

       And: having the lady waxing your eyebrows ask if you also want her way your mustache. I have a mustache? *Cry*’- Erin Kane Spock

5.   5.  being stuck in a lift when you need to go loo’- Nicole MacDonald
         
      6.  ‘Forgetting about the six paper cuts on your hands before dousing them in sanitizer.’- Tamara Naryan
7.   
      7.   While shaving in the shower, I reach for what I thought was a new razor only to discover the blade was old after painfully running it down the front of my neck."’- Slamdunk  (Thank God I don’t shave.  My face.)

8.   8.  ‘ stepping in dog poop BAREFOOT.’- Shannon Whitney Messenger 
9.   
      9.   ‘for me a rejection letter is worse than waxing my bikini line.’- Helena Soister
    
     10.    ‘my toddler niece whacking me over the nose. That has got to be more fun. :)’- Lindsay (aka Isabella)


      What sucky things do you think feel better than a rejection?

39 comments:

Melissa said...

oh my god. This made me laugh hysterically. Awesome!

I'd rather face an Axe Murderer than a Rejection letter! No Joke.

Vicki Rocho said...

I'd rather face a BUG all creepy and crawly.

These were fabulous! I really laughed at dropped the jar of jam. My nephew dropped a brand new bottle of ketchup (the big one too) on the floor and the plastic splintered and we had ketchup EVERYWHERE. Who knew there was that much in the bottle?

JustineDell said...

Sweet start to the weekend! I love a good giggle!

I think I would rather have my toenails plucked out one by one than have form rejections to a partial. I've had them...they suck. I think ripping off your toenails would be less painful. And they would heal.

~JD

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Those are great! Although I think the cat pee is worse.
And I'll add stepping on a large slug in one's bare feet at midnight. Yes, I've done that. Yes, I probably woke the neighbors.

Bethany Elizabeth said...

:) Can I request more of these? Just so if you want to post another one, you can actually have it be back by popular demand. :D
I can't really contribute, I'd feel like I'm cheating, since I haven't started querying yet, and hence - no rejections. But just wait till September. (when I'm planning on starting) I'll probably have a massive list then. :D

salarsenッ said...

Hah!! These are great!! Me: I'd rather deliver a twenty pound baby with a forty pound head than receive a rejection from a partial or a full request.

Aubrie said...

Very funny and very fitting for me: I have three partials out right now. The last thing I want to see is a form rejection.

Laura Pauling said...

I think pretty much anything like that is better than rejection! Hilarious!

Candyland said...

Haha. I'd also rather go through 3 days of childbirth with no epidural than get a form to a partial or full:/

Stina Lindenblatt said...

Since I hate puke, I'd probably rather have the form rejection that have my child vomit in my face. Seriously.

I can't figure out something yucky that I'd rather have happen than receive a form rejection. Maybe I've had a enough of them that they don't faze me anymore. Or maybe it's because I haven't started querying my new project. Ask me this question in the fall (assuming I get any requests). ;)

Jaydee Morgan said...

These are too funny - thanks for the laughs :)

Clara said...

A really smelly fart, of the kind that precedes diarea. That fart you can taste in your tongue as you close your nose and try to breathe through your mouth.
All in a closed, non ventilated enviroment.
Disgusting, but still better then a rejection.

Janet Johnson said...

Such great descriptions! Everything I come up with has been used.

(Loved the squished banana one . . . totally been there).

The Alliterative Allomorph said...

When did you post this? I missed it :( Um, so funny! Ok, mine would be: Spending the whole day editing a manuscript that is due the next morning, then accidentally replacing that newly edited file in a folder with the older version from your email. I did that once. Was not a happy camper.

Carolyn V. said...

LOL! Those are awesome! I'd rather have my blood taken than a rejection. ouch.

Matthew Rush said...

Having my puppy defecate in the kitchen while I am tied up momentarily with an armload fully of groceries so that she then steps in her own feces and playfully spreads it around the tile - is pretty shitty (see what I did there?) but it is not worse than a rejection on a submission.

Raquel Byrnes said...

This reminds me of those 'What's grosser than gross?' things we used to tell each other during recess.

I'd rather fall off a bridge and have my eyelid snag on a nail on the way down, than get another rejection.

MBW aka Olleymae said...

lol...these are awesome.

I'd rather get bitten by Edward Cullen than get a rejection.

...er, nevermind.

Elana Johnson said...

Ha! Great list. Going to a restaurant and ordering bacon, only to find out they're out. That's better than a rejection -- and I ADORE bacon.

Talei said...

Oh the waxing sounds familiar! I'd rather be forced to sit and listen to a bad concert or band who I loathe than read a 'R' letter. See - I can't even write the word! :)

Lindsay (a.k.a Isabella) said...

Hehe, loved these.

I have another one. I'd rather swim through shark infested waters with an open wound.

Diane J. said...

Oh my gosh, thank you for the laugh!

I would rather clean a bar bathroom...make that the men's bathroom, than get a form rejection letter.

cassandrajade said...

Fantastic list. Thanks for sharing this and I loved reading the comments here.

February Grace said...

I would rather have a 25 gauge needle stuck into my eye without sedation in a doctor's office after my eye pressure spiked a day post-op (and I have done) rather than get a rejection on a full. Ditto for removal of stubborn post-operative stitches in the eyes.

Yup. That was less painful than rejection. And let me tell you, that really sucked.

Thanks for the laughs, everyone...

Adventures in Children's Publishing said...

Wait, so are we saying we don't LIKE form rejections? Because I'm getting that impression.

Great job, everyone. Very funny!

Martina

Michelle said...

VERY FUNNY!

But . . . all the agents in the universe can line up and spit on my ms en masse before I deliver a 20 pounder with a 40 pound head! LOL! Seriously, though, my biggest baby was 10 lbs. 9 ozs., and I'm due in Sept. So yeah, I'd take an R over that. (Hope I didn't just jinx myself with the partial I have out now with a FAB agent!)

I'd rather have snakes, scorpions, and worms slither all over me than get another R. Well, depends on the agent ;)

Great blog--so glad I found it!

Solvang Sherrie said...

Cleaning up vomit for SIX HOURS STRAIGHT (I am not exaggerating!) when my two children had the stomach flu was WAY more fun than reading another rejection.

Mary Witzl said...

Number 4 made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes.

I can add my own sucky thing: going to the toilet at night when the bulb has blown in the bathroom, and sitting on a slug that has obviously circumnavigated the toilet seat. This was in a house without running hot water or insulation, in the dead of winter, when there was snow on the ground outside. Washing slug slime off your butt with cold water doesn't rank high on the comfort scale.

Susan Fields said...

Those were hilarious! Thanks so much for sharing them and giving me a good belly laugh. :)

Watery Tart said...

This just in! TODAY even! The pasta sticking in the collander when you try to pour it to the bowl, and then the jostle you give it throwing half OVER the side of the bowl all over your bare feet. (I still have orzo between my toes)--but STILL better than a form rejection to a partial (haven't even had a REQUEST for a full yet! *cries*)

The Empress said...

Oh...this makes me too scared to even go for it!!

Bridge Marie said...

Haha, these are great!

I'd rather shovel my car out of the snow in June than face a form rejection! (And this is saying something. You can't quite understand the hatred of car-in-snow-shoveling unless you've grown up somewhere you do that five months of the year.)

Rachna Chhabria said...

OMG..I could not stop laughing. Actually I would rather face a grizzly bear than a rejection letter.
Co-incidently my post too is about rejection. The stuff of a writer's nightmares.

Kris said...

This cuts a little close to home as I've got two fulls and a partial out right now...can't think of anything worse than getting a form reject on one of them!

Anne R. Allen said...

I've just linked to this very funny post from my blog. Unfortunately, the first link I put up was bad and people got a message saying you don't exist. I hope I've remedied that and I apologize.

Vatche said...

Stabbing my ear with a freaking q-tip. Owww! Too deep! Now, every time I yawn it hurts...

Anyway, hysterical comments!

Write on!

notesfromnadir said...

Clever, but too much sensory overload w/ some of these images!

However, has anyone pondered the manuscripts, partials, & query letters that haven't been answered? That have just disappeared into a vat of silence?

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF said...

ahahahaha THIS IS SO MANY KINDS OF AWESOME I LOVE ITTTT

LTM said...

I'm with editor-in-chief--this is SO SO awesome. LOVE you guys~ xoxo :o)

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